YOU ARE A TRUE-BLUE ILONGGO IF (sent by a friend)

Your one peso is pisos,

You take a bath using a tabo which you call Caltex,

Your bathroom has at least one lugod

(some homes have one for each family member),

and you don't flinch at taking a bath in cold water from the tap.

Your nanay used to make you drink Mirinda or Royal

Tru- Orange when you had a fever, you believe illnesses

are curable with labatiba, and luya is needed for fussy babies.

Sinamak is a staple on your dining table (the best

Ilonggo invention, banned on airplanes even before

911), going with uga - especially abo.

You say tabagak, not tuyo , and guinamos, not bagoong,

kalo-kalo not sinangag,

and binuro makes your mouth water.

Your toyo is patis and your patis is toyo,

You use atsuete for your adobo and pinamalhan,

For lunch you like laswa, kbl ( kadyos, baboy, langka),

guinat-an nga tambo with tugabang and mais,

ginat-an nga munggo, apan apan, and pangat .

"Bilong bilong" is not a song but a fish.

November 1 means eating ibus, suman, suman latik,

kalamay-hati, mwasi, bayi-bayi, valenciana or other native

delicacies with glutinous rice and coconut milk.

You remember making bibingka with your playmates in the backyard,

and you dream of dark purple or black tikoy;

You remember Wong Yee Long for ensaymada and bitsukoy,

Buho for teren-teren or pan de siosa and

Paa near the Jaro plaza for pan de sal; and

being awakened from your afternoon nap by

"Puto lanson!!!"

You don't care for Jollibee, Mr. Donut, and Chow King.

Instead you think Kong Kee for siopao, and

you have cravings for Dainty pancit, pinsek prito, and bola-bola ;

When you think groceries you think Campos or Pendy's,

or Washington Supermarket, not SM City.

For school supplies you think Commoner, and for gifts

Art Shop; or the sinamay dealers at Hoskyns, where you also go

for salted peanuts and Sam's shoes.

Aldegeuer is what you think of when you think

fresh fruit.

You call those you love palangga, pangga, langga or

ga , you call your siblings or cousins inday, nonoy or

toto ...You call those who are older than you manang or

manong, You catch the attention of sales attendants by calling

them Day or To, and the jeepney drivers Tiyoy.

Your childhood games include tumba patis, taksi, piko, bagol, pityaw,

tubiganay, hole-ins, panagu-ay , balay-balay, ins, tin-tin baka,

sikyu.

You scared yourself silly talking about aswang,

tik-tik, tayhu, kapre, kama-kama, morto , etc at night;

You played Spirit of the Glass on a regular basis;

You used to listen (or still listen) to Sin-o Ang May

Sala, Lain Siya Sa Iban , and Toyang Ermitanya,

Your grandparents read Yuhum magazine and

Hiligaynon;

You call a person, thing, place and event kwan when

you forget it ( si kwan, ang kwan, sa kwan),

You used to sleep in an aboy-aboy made of patadyong

when you were a baby (probably applies only to us below the

poverty line),

You understand that "Particulars Keep Out" sign means

outsiders keep out (believe me, this sign may look and sound

English but only Ilonggos use it),

You use words such as ahay (expression of pity,

grief, empathy), yuga (expression of disbelief, surprise), and

ambot ah (to say you don't know, expression of impatience)..

You often start your sentence with ti,

You say goodbye by saying halong, or andam.

For you the mayor of Iloilo will always be Roding Ganzon,

and the governor - Norada;

Villa is still pristine beach, and Fort is your idea of a nice Sunday afternoon, with chicken barbecue; and

you remember rushing to catch Dona Florentina to go

to Bacolod or Don Julio to go to Manila, bringing

with you guinamos, Panaderia de Molo, barquillos or pinasugbo for the relatives up North.